Category Archives: shirtless

2011 MLB Betting Predictions – April 9th

I usually wait for the first week of the MLB season to play out before I start my MLB betting line posts. I did rather well over the last few years when I have done these and I hope I can help lead some people in the right direction. My picks are against the spread and I also do over/under lines. Will the Red Sox make it two in-a-row against the Yankees? Can the Indians keep up their offense? Here are the MLB betting lines & predictions for April 9th, 2011.

Philadelphia Phillies +1 1/2 (Roy Oswalt) vs. Atlanta Braves -1 1/2 (Brandon Beachy) – Over/Under 7 1/2
Phillies – Over

After the way that the Braves rocked Cliff Lee yesterday, the Braves will be bet heavy today. The Phillies are a veteran team and will have revenge on their mind.
You have to have a short memory in the MLB and they will get to Beachy early in this contest. The O/U is set at 7 1/2 and if this game goes the way I think, it will go over. The smart bet would be a parlay on the Phillies moneyline & the over.

New York Yankees +1 1/2 (Ivan Nova) vs. Boston Red Sox -1 1/2 (Clay Buchholz) – O/U 10
Red Sox – Under

The Red Sox started off bad this year, but they came out yesterday and took care of Phil Hughes early. Ivan Nova has better stuff than Hughes has right now, but you don’t want the Red Sox to gain any confidence. Buchholz should handle the Yankees hitters and stretch the winning steak to two.

Kansas City Royals +1 1/2 (Bruce Chen) vs. Detroit Tigers -1 1/2 (Phil Coke) – O/U 9 1/2
Tigers – Over

Can you look at these starting pitchers and honestly think that they won’t score a combined 10 runs? I’m scared at what Miguel Cabrera will do to Bruce Chen. The Tigers will win outright, cover, and this game will go over.

Tampa Bay Rays +1 1/2 (Wade Davis) vs. Chicago White Sox -1 1/2 (Philip Humber) – O/U 9
White Sox – Over

Wade Davis was rocky in his first start and the White Sox offense have looked very good. The Rays notched their first win last night, thanks to a Matt Thornton blow-save. The White Sox will bounce back and take care of business.

Chicago Cubs +1 1/2 (Matt Garza) vs. Milwaukee Brewers -1 1/2 (Chris Narveson) – O/U 8 1/2
Cubs – Under

Matt Garza’s Cubs debut had flashes of greatness. He stuck out double-digit Pirates, but still had a few dumb mistakes. Chris Narveson also had a good debut, but the Cubs bats have looked in mid-season form, if only their bullpen was in the same shape.

Washington Nationals +1 1/2 (Tom Gorzelanny) vs. New York Mets -1 1/2 (Chris Capuano) – O/U 8 1/2
Mets – Under

If this game was being played in any other park with these two pitchers, the line would be 10, but Citi Field is huge. Gorzelanny vs. Capuano might get ugly, but as long as they keep the ball down, it’ll go under. I might want to stay away from this bet, these teams are so inconsistent.

Oakland Athletics -1 1/2 (Gio Gonzalez) vs. Minnesota Twins +1 1/2 (Nick Blackburn) – O/U 8
A’s – Under

Gio Gonzalez was the buzzworthy pitcher in fantasy baseball this year and he will have a solid year. The Twins are just trying to get healthy, so Oakland has a slight edge in this game.

Cincinnati Reds -1 1/2 (Bronson Arroyo) vs. Arizona Diamondback +1 1/2 (Daniel Hudson) – O/U 8 1/2
Diamondbacks – Over

I learned a rule in Vegas last year…never bet on Bronson Arroyo! It doesn’t help that he is still dealing with mono, that’s a huge red flag. I really like Daniel Hudson in this contest.

Los Angeles Dodgers -1 1/2 (Hiroki Kuroda) vs. San Diego Padres +1 1/2 (Dustin Moseley) – O/U 7
Dodgers – Under

Kuroda has had solid numbers of the last calendar year, but he doesn’t get much respect. It will help him that the game is at Petco Park, the Padres will have a hard time going yard against him.

Toronto Blue Jays -1 1/2 (Brett Cecil) vs. Los Angeles Angles +1 1/2 (Scott Kazmir) – O/U 9
Blue Jays – Over

Name the last time that Scott Kazmir looked like a pitcher that should be on a contender? I’ll wait…

Cleveland Indians +1 1/2 (Justin Masterson) vs. Seattle Mariners +1 1/2 (Doug Fisher) – O/U 7 1/2
Indians – Over

Masterson looked great his first time out this year and they rocked the Mariners yesterday. Seattle looks bad and Cleveland wants to pound their former skipper (Eric Wedge).

St. Louis Cardinals +1 1/2 (Jaime Garcia) vs. San Francisco Giants -1 1/2 (Matt Cain) – O/U 6 1/2
Cardinals – Under

This game should be very low-scoring, since both Garcia & Cain looked very good in their debuts. The Cardinals will miss Matt Holliday, but the Giants bullpen, mostly Brian Wilson, hasn’t been dominating.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

2011 Fantasy Baseball: Catchers

The catcher position looks fairly top-heavy this year in fantasy baseball. You have a young group on their way up and a few prominent catchers that look to be transitioning into a designated-hitter role. I ranked the top 20 catchers and added some sleepers and busts to help you in your draft.

My rankings are based on a standard 5×5 league. If you have any specific questions about a different league, email me bobbymcrib@gmail.com. Continue reading →

Tim Tebow Is A Virgin

If anyone is shocked that Tebow is a virgin, I have some land to sell you. He is a devout Christian and off the field, he has the manners of a nobleman. During the SEC Media Day, a random reporter shouted out the question, “Are you a virgin?” and Tebow responded with “Yes, I am.” He chuckled initially, but are you surprised? He wants to be a preacher and has the charm to be a politician. He was on the Dan Patrick Show earlier today and he said “Sir” after every answer. He goes on mission trip to help circumcise 3rd-world children, he’s like Mother Teresa with shoulder pads. Continue reading →

2009 Un-All-Star Team

Last year, I did my 2008 Un-All-Star Team post in early May. A lot of my team ended up turning things around and a few of them actually ended up with career numbers. I wanted to do this year’s post a little deeper into the season. They are currently about 70 games in right now and some great players are looking like they need some extended spring training to regain their usually consistent form. About this time of year you can throw out the term “slow-starter” and begin using “bad year.”

Some of these players do have some power numbers, but I’m looking at average mostly. If you are still floating around the Mendoza Line and it’s almost July, you are having troubles. A few of these players have been trying to play through injuries (Alfonso Soriano), but his season isn’t living up to expectations.

Here is my list of the 2009 Un-All-Star Team sorted by position. The number next to the position players is their batting average as of today and the number next to the pitchers are their ERA.

Catchers
Kelly Shoppach .194
Dioner Navarro .218
Geovany Soto .222

First Base
Conor Jackson .182
Carlos Guillen .200
Chris Davis .200
Jason Giambi .212
Lance Berkman .241

Second Base
Alexi Casilla .180
Dan Uggla .216
Howie Kendrick .231
Kelly Johnson .227

Third Base
Garrett Atkins .205
Alex Rodriguez .212

Shortstop
Mike Aviles .183
Khalil Greene .213
Jimmy Rollins .223
Orlando Cabrera .235

Outfield
Ken Griffey Jr. .220
Grady Sizemore .223
Alfonso Soriano .229
B.J. Upton .229
Ryan Ludwick .234
Pat Burrell .236

Starting Pitchers
Chien-Ming Wang 12.30
Oliver Perez 9.97
Scott Kazmir 7.69
Fausto Carmona 7.42
Ricky Nolasco 7.15
Andy Sonnanstine 6.60
John Lackey 6.10
Francisco Lirano 5.91

Bullpen
Brad Lidge 7.27
Troy Percival 6.35
B.J. Ryan 5.71
Manny Corpas 5.40
J.J. Putz 5.22

If anyone has any recommendations for the 2009 Un-All-Star Team let me know.

I’m sorry if you found this post in hopes of trying to find shirtless photos of Grady Sizemore of any other of our players. It’s kind of a running joke on this blog, since it seems like I get a lot of hit from google from people trying to find shirtless photos from players from Grady Sizemore and Ryan Braun to the confusing duo of C.C. Sabathia and Prince Fielder.

Designated Hitter
David Ortiz .207

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

God, Help Me!

After a rough day of college football and non-competitive college basketball games, I am stuck with the Browns/Bengals game on my television. These teams are two of the worst teams to watch since 50% of each of their teams are on injured reserve. Brady Quinn, Derek Anderson, Carson Palmer, Chad Johnson (Ocho Cinco), Kellen Winslow, and about thirty other players are not going to play in this game. This leaves me with watching a Ken Dorsey vs. Ryan Fitzpatrick match-up.

I want to have fun while watching this game, so these are the things that are going to keep me interested.

– Drink every time Braylon Edwards drops a ball.

– Over/Under 2 minutes into the game that they start talking about next season for both of these teams.

– Over/Under 4 times, that the announcers talk about Ken Dorsey’s college career.

– Count the amount of people with bags over their heads vs. the idiots without any shirts on

– The Bengals should have less points than people in the team with felony charges

– Realize that Romeo Crennel outweighs most of his offensive linemen

– Laugh repeatedly when the announcers describe the history of this rivalry and try to make it sound watchable.

I’m not sure if I will be able to make it through this game, this might be my last post. If I don’t make it, I hereby bequeath this blog to my roommate.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

It’s Been Awhile Pt. 3

I’ve been on and off of here for the last two months and I am going to be more active since college basketball will be in full force very soon. A lot more stuff to annoy and praise with the upcoming NBA, College Football BCS debacle, NFL season wind-down, and NHL. I can’t wait until Mel Kiper and Todd McShay invade ESPN every five minutes, they need their own show.

I know what you’re thinking, the last two times that I had a post called “It’s Been Awhile” you used it as an excuse to post a picture of a girl that you have a celebri-crush on…I will explain.

– “Tim Lincecum shirtless” google term has been directing tons of traffic to my blog, so I figured that I needed to actually have a picture of Tim Lincecum, well, shirtless. People must have a need for shirtless photos of Ryan Braun, Evan Longoria, B.J. Upton, Brady Quinn, Grady Sizemore, Gabe Kapler, and even C.C. Sabathia to get directed to my blog with the term “shirtless” after their name. I need to boost traffic and with football and basketball season going, here are players that I’m sure will make my blog better. Reggie Bush, Allen Iverson, Colt McCoy, Sam Bradford, Chris Paul, Lebron James, Jay Cutler (really?), Tom Brady, Terrell Owens, Tony Romo, Matt Leinart, Vince Young, Brett Favre, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Garnett, Ladianian Tomlinson, Michael Beasley, Matt Ryan, and for good measure, Grady Jackson.

– My fantasy football teams are all over .500 and I am leading 2 of the 4 leagues I am in.

– Spicy Chicken Nuggets at Wendy’s are not as good as the regular chicken nuggets.

– Sonic Drive-Thru is my new vice. I love that I can get jalapenos on basically anything I want.

– The Mobsters game on Myspace is very addictive.

– Sam Bradford will be a better NFL quarterback than Colt McCoy and Graham Harrell.

– Logan’s Roadhouse is currently paying my bills.

– Greg Oden plays like Dikembe Mutombo without the finger wave.

– The Indiana Pacers might actually be a .500 team. Danny Granger looks like the real deal.

– Brett Favre has probably cost the Jets at least two wins, they would be 9-1 if Chad Pennington was the QB.

– Girls are getting very risky with their facebook photos.

– I think 90% of my friends dressed up as sluts at Halloween and brag about it.

– Texas Tech’s offense looks like every other Texas Tech offense the past ten years. I’m sure Kliff Klingsbury is pissed that the Red Raiders never had a defense when he played.

– Accountemps piss me off.

– The new Emery EP is very good.

– Showtime have two great series on their channel. “Dexter” and “Californication” are must-see television shows.

– Real Chance At Love is better than Rock of Love Charm School, but that is just one man’s opinion.

– Fantasy Focus Football podcast isn’t as good as the baseball podcast, but still amazing.

– Oklahoma Sooners basketball team will be very, very good this season.

– You will see a lot of Stephen Curry this season, I’m pretty sure every non-conference game of Davidson is televised nationally.

– Andre Dawson deserves to be in the Hall of Fame.

– Chauncey Billups will flourish on the Denver Nuggets and Allen Iverson will have trouble in Detroit.

– Fantasy Hockey is very hard to play, especially when you barely watch the sport.

– On the other hand, Fantasy Basketball is extremely easy when you have Chris Paul and Danny Granger on your team.

– I still like to stare at Katy Perry.

– I don’t understand the buzz about “Twilight,” I think “Role Models” would be a better movie to watch.

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A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Breaking News – Vince Young Likes Fried Chicken

I woke up to a lot of banter on morning sports talk shows about the state of mind of Vince Young. Chris Mortensen may have said the most absurd, semi-racist thing I’ve heard before 9am. He was describing the situation where the police was searching for Vince Young and worried about his state of mind. They found him at his buddy’s house watching Monday Night Football. Mortensen said, “He was just at his buddy’s house eating fried chicken and watching football.” I think a better use of words could have been used when describing what Young was doing at a friend’s house. I mean you either refrain from using “fried chicken” in reference to a African-American male or you go all out and make it like he was re-enacting a scene from the movie “Friday” or “Don’t Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In Your Hood.”

Vince Young seems like a pretty weak person. The kind of person that has went through life where he’s been showered with praise. I know he may have had a harsh childhood financially, but you know he had the football field to rip the local guys up when he was feeling a little down. He hasn’t had the chance to do anything in the NFL yet, the only reason they were in the playoffs last year was due to Indianapolis playing Jim Sorgi and resting Peyton Manning in the final game of the year.

Yong has a few weeks to heal up physically and get his mind around the situation. I think he may need a mentor to help him through everything or he’ll end up like Michael Vick. I’m not saying that he is going to be the Don King of professional dog-fighting, but he will end up being a bust and never maturing into the kind of NFL player he should become. The Titans did sign Chris Simms, he also went to University of Texas, I don’t think they have much in common, but maybe he can help Young out. The best situation would have been the Titans drafting Limas Sweed, Young target at UT in last year’s draft, but that didn’t happen.

Kerry Collins isn’t going to steal anyone’s job away. Collins has had some success in the NFL, he lead a star-less NY Giants offense to the Super Bowl nearly a decade ago. If the Titans signed Daunte Culpepper or drafted another young quarterback last season, Young would have been all but out of Tennessee, but it’s still his job to lose.

I would have checked the clubs out first before I called the cops.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Out On A Limb – 2008 NFL Predictions

Seems like all football analysts want to do is say some random thing that they think may happen this season and if they come true, they are awesome, if they don’t, they never mention them again. It sounds like a fun game, so I want to play. These are some predictions that seems out-of-the-box, but of course I will stay with tradition and brag if any of these become remotely true.

– I want to start off with the man in the picture, Brady Quinn. He will become the starter for Cleveland by week 8. Derek Anderson is a one-year wonder, much like Scott Mitchell was for Detroit in the mid-90s.

– Vince Young will end the season with more touchdowns than interceptions

– Larry Johnson will rush for 1600 yards and 17 touchdowns

– The Jets will win the AFC East

– Chad Johnson will lead the AFC in receiving yards

– Tom Brady will throw less than 30 TDs this season

– Kurt Warner will throw more than 30 TDs this season

– The Houston Texans will make the playoffs

– Matt Ryan will win Offensive Rookie Of The Year

– Adrian Peterson will only play in 10 games this season

– Shawne Merriman will get at least 8 sacks and play in at least 13 games.

– Drew Brees will lead the New Orleans Saints to win the NFC South

– J.T. O’Sullivan will throw for more than 28 TDs

– The St. Louis Rams will be better than 8-8

– The Kansas Chiefs will have the worse record in the NFL

– Marvin Harrison will retire after this season

– Daunte Culpepper will have signed with a team by week 6

– Nate Burleson will lead the Seahawks in receiving and TDs

– Rex Grossman will start at least 5 games this season

– Jerod Mayo will win Defensive Rookie Of The Year

– Marshawn Lynch will have a better fantasy season than Ladainian Tomlinson

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Fantasy God – Grady Sizemore

The Indians are not having the spectacular season many experts predicted that they would have. They are currently on an 8-game winning streak, but they are still double-digits behind the leader of the AL Central. Cleveland does have a long bright spot this season, Grady Sizmore. He has mostly been more flash than substance in the past few seasons, but this year with Travis Hafner out, he has been the run-producing beast he was expected to eventually become.

The ladies have always loved Grady Sizemore, but this season fantasy owners are even starting to propose marriage to the Cleveland center-fielder. Last night he joined the 30/30 club, but hitting two homers in a Indians victory. Over the past few seasons he has seen his power numbers and stolen bases increase, but his batting average has taken a trend downward. He is receiving less pitches to hit, if Cleveland can get a power guy hitting behind him, Sizemore should see more walks and less strikeouts.

Sizemore is on pace to have better than a 35/35 season, but not quite a 40/40, unless he goes on a tear in the last few weeks of the season. The Indians should be a better team next season with a healthy Hafner and bringing up Matt Laporta, the gem of the C.C. Sabathia trade. Ben Francisco has shown potential along with possible 2009 closer Jensen Lewis.

Sizemore has been the definition of healthy and has played every game the last few seasons. If he can keep consistent and play at this high of a level, he could be due a large contract in the near future. He does have that “star” quality the Yankees love to have, by the time he is a free agent, Derek Jeter could be on his last legs. The New York media would love to follow him around and lead with him on Page Six.Grady Sizemore will not flame out over the next few years. The wear and tear of him playing everyday shouldn’t bother him. Progressive Field isn’t on Astro-turf, so the “Andre Dawson effect” shouldn’t take effect, so his knees wouldn’t turn into rust by season 10. Sizemore has fun in Cleveland, at this very moment he could have any woman he wants in Ohio, that must be a great feeling.

This could be my last “Fantasy God” post in reference to baseball this season. The head-to-head leagues are going to be in playoff mode and it’s about too late to make a huge move in roto leagues. Fantasy Football drafts are in swing, so expect an almost weekly addition once the football season gets underway.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

I Promised You Mullets, I Give You The Best One

Dog The Bounty Hunter is amazing. I say that for many reasons, but mostly because he is can track a many by scent. I have been given the opportunity to give away Dog The Bounty Hunter – The Best of Season 4 DVD and I can’t pass up the chance to give my readers something special.

Dog is a man of faith, but doesn’t pass up a chance to curse at a guy who jumps his bail. He is part human/part Chuck Norris, you can’t run away from the man. I know he may have said some unsavory things over the past year, but we can all look past that and just appreciate the mega-human he has become.

If you want a chance to win this DVD please comment either on this post or anywhere on the blog and I will choose 2 winners. Whomever leaves the most creative comment will win this DVD.

Don’t be fooled into thinking that this will be the only giveaway this week. We will also be giving away another set of DVDs. So keep tuned to the site with more detials.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Michael Phelps Is A Dolphin

I am very excited to witness history tonight, but someone should check Michael Phelps for a blow-hole and/or gills. I know the kid looks like the bastard son of Eli Manning and Jim from “The Office,” but he is a beast. What he did in these Olympics is just staggering. The last time an American Olympian garnered this kind of buzz was Michael Johnson back in ’96 or maybe the Dan vs. Dave ad campaign that kind of hit the fan.

Phelps got his 8th gold medal at the Beijing Olympics tonight and he needed his fellow team members to help him. Not only did he have 8 gold medals, he broke 7 world records in the process. He will be the next Lance Armstrong, meaning that he will be America’s Superhero. He will have to decide what cause he will be backing and what color bracelet he will choose to sell.

The final total for Michael Phelps in his Olympic career is 16 total medals, 14 of them being gold. He is still a young man, so the 2012 Olympics could be in his future. I feel like he should always wear American flag clothing from this point on. Look for him to start dating a famous actress within the next calendar year.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

It’s Been Awhile – Part 2

I know the pictures doesn’t fit the blog, but it didn’t with part 1 either. I’ve always thought Lacey Chabert was cute, but then like a couple years ago she got hot, so I like to feel like I was one of the first people on the bus. I need to start a petition online for her to be in more movies. I know she does a lot of voice-over work, but I think she is very nice to look at and seems to be a good actor. That’s my opinion on her and I just wanted to share that.

I haven’t posted since like early July and that is going to change. I’ve been in the middle of starting a new career, moving my corporate office (apartment), and started seeing a new ladyperson, so I guess all those things added up means less nerd time for the blog. I am going to make more time for this since I love writing posts and receiving some pretty creative feedback from readers. Instead of writing a bunch of individual posts about little things, I’m going to have some bulletins on stuff I’ve ran across since my last post.

Before I start posting some small stuff, I have one large thing I’ve noticed. I have had a pretty good month with traffic and I wanted to see where this traffic was coming from. I noticed something a little disturbing and hilarious. A lot of my traffic is coming from search engines when people type in their favorite athlete, but then typing “shirtless” after it. “Ryan Braun shirtless,” “Tim Lincecum shirtless,” and for some odd reason “Josh McRoberts shirtless” is a common phrase to find my website. Maybe I should be shaping my site to cater to male athlete groupies. I know my traffic would double if I had some sort of “Grady Sizemore shirtless” posts…maybe if I just put shirtless in every post this page will rival Perez Hilton. Now, random things…

– Manny Ramirez plaing for the Dodgers makes sense, most L.A. fans don’t show up until the 3rd inning anyways. Sounds like an ideal setting for Manny being Manny.

– Columbus Clippers game can be a lot of fun, especially when guys like Pokey Reese makes a mockery of the sport. I did get to see Ryan Zimmerman during a rehab assignment, he’s going to be very good.

– I enjoy baked goods more than I thought.

– “One Day As A Lion” is very good, Zack De La Rocha and the drummer from Mars Volta will do great things together.

– “Once” is a good movie, even if you’ve seen it more than 10 times.

– “Dark Knight” was the best movie I’ve seen at least 4-5 years.

– I could care less about Brett Favre.

– I kind of want the Bears to get Brett Favre, but I would like ESPN to stop with their hourly “Where In The World Is Brett Favre” segments.

– I hate moving.

– I know more about vinyl fencing than I should. Please go to usavinyl.com for all of your vinyl fencing needs.

– The Cubs are much better against the Brewers than they are against any other team.

– While listening to 1460AM THE FAN in Columbus, OH, turn the station with the “Mid-Day Show” comes on. The show was much better than Chris Spielman was on the program.

– I’m still not a fan of Futurama, but I have a feeling that that could change.

– Last.FM is a pretty nice program

– I am still laughing that someone still thinks Kyle Farnsworth is still worth more than a “player to be named later.”

– Maybe I say “shirtless” a few more times

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.