Category Archives: chicago cubs

It’s Been Awhile – Part 5

Hey guys, have you noticed that I’ve started writing again? I started this blog 4 years ago this month and I have taken five extended breaks from writing. Every time I take a hiatus, I feel the need to tell people why I decided to take a break. Here it goes…

I’ve always been “too honest” on this site and I can tell you guys that my passion for writing…it faded. I had a day job, a girlfriend, a busy social life, yet I kept writing here and for a few other sites. Over the last year and a half, I’ve had a few losses in my life and it increased my “fuck it” impulse. It’s not that I didn’t want to write, I couldn’t. The picture above is a photo of me that a friend shot in Vegas. It exemplifies how I felt about writing. I would sit at my laptop and my mind would be blank.

It’s not like I completely quit writing, I tried. I have been working on a short story for a few years now. I would have days where I would write, but they were few and far between. I’ve had a few freelance gigs and helped start a local nightlife site, but I didn’t get any joy from it. I know that this needed to change and I tried everything to try to re-boot my system, I even became a vegetarian for two months. I didn’t want my passion to die, so I kept trying new things and it slowly came back.

I can say that, as of today, my passion bucket is once again full. My mind is full of ideas and I’m ready to start making the magic happen again. I have agreed to write for a few other sites, as well as rejuvenating my own. I started this blog because of the NCAA Tournament and the phenomenon that happens every year. One unathletic whiteboy becomes the nation’s underdog…America’s White Boy. I started it with the idea of being the underdog. This site went from an idea to getting over 50k uniques a month. I hope to start that process again today.

Now that I’ve said all of that, this is the portion of this post where I list all of the things that I’ve learned since I’ve been gone.

– I’ve realized that the Cubs will never win the World Series

– Soccer moms listen to Bon Iver while they do “hot yoga”

– I’ve spent a lot of time drinking craft beer…a lot of time.

– I really love “Jungleland” by Bruce Springsteen, here’s a live version from 1975.

– My attempt at being a hardcore soccer fan, it never really happened. I don’t wake up early enough on the weekends.

– I finally watched “The Silence Of The Lambs”, so I now get a lot of old jokes & parodies of Buffalo Bill.

– I hate accounting. I really hate accounting.

– I’ve watched a lot of TV. I really like “Community”, “Parks & Recreation”, “Always Sunny In Philadelphia”, “New Girl”, & “The Big Bang Theory”

– You should “Like” me on Facebook.

– I hope to join together with some friends and start a podcast soon.

– Ryan Braun probably got away with taking steroids.

– 2011 was a pretty shitty year.

– I watch a lot of Josh Krajcik videos on YouTube.

– Grantland.com should be so much better than it is. I love long-form sports journalism & Chuck Klosterman. The site shouldn’t be named after Grantland Rice, it should be named after Will Leitch.

– I’m still addicted to Twitter @ Sweetbob.

– I think I personally know at least 100 “social media experts”, yet many lack any real-life social skills.

– I’m signed up for Google+, but I rarely use it. The only people who add me are from Sri Lanka or a country in the Orient.

– This past football season, I got over 100,000 uniques from Google from people searching for the terms “Tim Tebow Virgin” & “Tim Tebow Naked/Nude”. I used to just get a lot of hits from the term “shirtless” followed by popular baseball players’ names.

– I hate that a lot of sites are starting to use the “Bleacher Report” model of using “Top 10” lists or using slideshows to increase traffic.

– I’m no longer jaded by the music industry. I’ve realized that “the machine” is dying and independent artists are gaining more control of their lives.

– I really want to watch Wrestlemania this year.

– If you love drinking beer, you should be on Untappd.

– I think A&W Root Beer is the best root beer. I will fight anyone to the death if they tell me otherwise.

– I have been writing jokes for a stand-up routine. I have a lot of material…I just need to try it out on people.

– Twitter has ruined my grammar. I kind of have a hardcore “passive voice” problem. (English nerds will get that joke)

– Christina Aguilera is slowly turning into Snooki.

– I read something by Mark Twain, every day.

– If you play Christmas songs on a jukebox in February, everyone at that bar will hate you.

– I’m a huge fan of mash-ups, but I have a hatred for dub-step.

– My next phone will be an iPhone, I’ve grown tired of my Android…also, I would like to have Instagram.

– I like The Format more than the band, Fun.

– I’ve watched 95% of the Indiana Pacers games this year, watch out for them in the playoffs.

– Anthony Davis’s unibrow will get drafted #2, after Anthony Davis himself.

– Last week, I successfully groomed Nugget, my shih tzu.

– I have the best friends that a guy could have. I haven’t been around them that much in the last year, but I hope that will change soon. I think about you guys everyday.

Finally, I’ve always ended these posts with a picture of a hot girl. I did it just to make my girlfriend mad, since I’m single, I don’t feel the need to do it. Instead, here are some photos that crack me up and/or I want to put on the back of my business card.

Thanks for hanging in there with me!

Feel free to “Like” my blog on Facebook or click the Facebook box located within the sidebar.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

2011 MLB Betting Predictions – April 9th

I usually wait for the first week of the MLB season to play out before I start my MLB betting line posts. I did rather well over the last few years when I have done these and I hope I can help lead some people in the right direction. My picks are against the spread and I also do over/under lines. Will the Red Sox make it two in-a-row against the Yankees? Can the Indians keep up their offense? Here are the MLB betting lines & predictions for April 9th, 2011.

Philadelphia Phillies +1 1/2 (Roy Oswalt) vs. Atlanta Braves -1 1/2 (Brandon Beachy) – Over/Under 7 1/2
Phillies – Over

After the way that the Braves rocked Cliff Lee yesterday, the Braves will be bet heavy today. The Phillies are a veteran team and will have revenge on their mind.
You have to have a short memory in the MLB and they will get to Beachy early in this contest. The O/U is set at 7 1/2 and if this game goes the way I think, it will go over. The smart bet would be a parlay on the Phillies moneyline & the over.

New York Yankees +1 1/2 (Ivan Nova) vs. Boston Red Sox -1 1/2 (Clay Buchholz) – O/U 10
Red Sox – Under

The Red Sox started off bad this year, but they came out yesterday and took care of Phil Hughes early. Ivan Nova has better stuff than Hughes has right now, but you don’t want the Red Sox to gain any confidence. Buchholz should handle the Yankees hitters and stretch the winning steak to two.

Kansas City Royals +1 1/2 (Bruce Chen) vs. Detroit Tigers -1 1/2 (Phil Coke) – O/U 9 1/2
Tigers – Over

Can you look at these starting pitchers and honestly think that they won’t score a combined 10 runs? I’m scared at what Miguel Cabrera will do to Bruce Chen. The Tigers will win outright, cover, and this game will go over.

Tampa Bay Rays +1 1/2 (Wade Davis) vs. Chicago White Sox -1 1/2 (Philip Humber) – O/U 9
White Sox – Over

Wade Davis was rocky in his first start and the White Sox offense have looked very good. The Rays notched their first win last night, thanks to a Matt Thornton blow-save. The White Sox will bounce back and take care of business.

Chicago Cubs +1 1/2 (Matt Garza) vs. Milwaukee Brewers -1 1/2 (Chris Narveson) – O/U 8 1/2
Cubs – Under

Matt Garza’s Cubs debut had flashes of greatness. He stuck out double-digit Pirates, but still had a few dumb mistakes. Chris Narveson also had a good debut, but the Cubs bats have looked in mid-season form, if only their bullpen was in the same shape.

Washington Nationals +1 1/2 (Tom Gorzelanny) vs. New York Mets -1 1/2 (Chris Capuano) – O/U 8 1/2
Mets – Under

If this game was being played in any other park with these two pitchers, the line would be 10, but Citi Field is huge. Gorzelanny vs. Capuano might get ugly, but as long as they keep the ball down, it’ll go under. I might want to stay away from this bet, these teams are so inconsistent.

Oakland Athletics -1 1/2 (Gio Gonzalez) vs. Minnesota Twins +1 1/2 (Nick Blackburn) – O/U 8
A’s – Under

Gio Gonzalez was the buzzworthy pitcher in fantasy baseball this year and he will have a solid year. The Twins are just trying to get healthy, so Oakland has a slight edge in this game.

Cincinnati Reds -1 1/2 (Bronson Arroyo) vs. Arizona Diamondback +1 1/2 (Daniel Hudson) – O/U 8 1/2
Diamondbacks – Over

I learned a rule in Vegas last year…never bet on Bronson Arroyo! It doesn’t help that he is still dealing with mono, that’s a huge red flag. I really like Daniel Hudson in this contest.

Los Angeles Dodgers -1 1/2 (Hiroki Kuroda) vs. San Diego Padres +1 1/2 (Dustin Moseley) – O/U 7
Dodgers – Under

Kuroda has had solid numbers of the last calendar year, but he doesn’t get much respect. It will help him that the game is at Petco Park, the Padres will have a hard time going yard against him.

Toronto Blue Jays -1 1/2 (Brett Cecil) vs. Los Angeles Angles +1 1/2 (Scott Kazmir) – O/U 9
Blue Jays – Over

Name the last time that Scott Kazmir looked like a pitcher that should be on a contender? I’ll wait…

Cleveland Indians +1 1/2 (Justin Masterson) vs. Seattle Mariners +1 1/2 (Doug Fisher) – O/U 7 1/2
Indians – Over

Masterson looked great his first time out this year and they rocked the Mariners yesterday. Seattle looks bad and Cleveland wants to pound their former skipper (Eric Wedge).

St. Louis Cardinals +1 1/2 (Jaime Garcia) vs. San Francisco Giants -1 1/2 (Matt Cain) – O/U 6 1/2
Cardinals – Under

This game should be very low-scoring, since both Garcia & Cain looked very good in their debuts. The Cardinals will miss Matt Holliday, but the Giants bullpen, mostly Brian Wilson, hasn’t been dominating.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Are Cubs Better With Carlos Pena?

The Chicago Cubs may have missed out on signing Adam Dunn, so they signed another left-handed power bat to play first-base, Carlos Pena. Pena struck out 33% of the time last season, but he did struggle with plantar fasciitis. Was last season’s .196 average due to injury or diminished skills? Are the Cubs a better team with Carlos Pena?

It was no secret that the Chicago Cubs wanted to sign Adam Dunn this off-season. He has murdered them at Wrigley Field as an opponent since he came up with the Cincinnati Reds. He bats left-handed, has excellent power, near the top of the league in on-base percentage, but also near the top in strikeouts. They would have played Dunn at first-base, which has been vacant since they traded Derrek Lee at the trading deadline. Since they missed out on Dunn, they needed to sign another power left-handed first-baseman and they chose former Tampa Bay Ray, Carlos Pena. Pena has many qualities that Dunn possesses, but they differ in two major ways. Pena’s batting average and on-base percentage are very poor, but he does bring gold-glove defense to the position.

Pena and the Cubs agreed on a one-year deal worth $10 million dollars. It makes sense for Chicago to take a risk on Pena, since this is more of a tryout. If Pena turns things around and produces, he could get a longer deal after the season.

Pena, 33, will be reunited with hitting coach Rudy Jaramillo, who was the hitting coach with the Texas Rangers when Pena came up in that organization. His best season was in 2007 when he hit 46 homers, batted .282 and drove in 121 runs. He fell off a bit, but he has been selected to an All-Star game back in 2009.

The Tampa Bay Rays will miss Pena’s power, but due to their payroll issues, they were forced to let him walk. They are also let Joaquin Benoit, Carl Crawford, and Rafael Soriano go un-signed. The team is also rumored to be trading shortstop, Jason Bartlett for cheaper talent. The Rays loss could be the Cubs gain, but time will tell.

Where will Pena hit in the order? He will probably bat 4th or 5th, depending on where new manager, Mike Quade, moves Aramis Ramirez in the order. The Cubs need to protect Ramirez in the order, something they have tried to do for awhile. Milton Bradley was supposed to do that, but that was a disaster. The Cubs batting order should look a little different next season, since they are attempting to move Kosuke Fukudome. Tyler Colvin had a breakout rookie campaign and he played his way into the starting lineup, making Fukudome expendable.

The Cubs are a more balanced team with Pena in the line-up, but fans have to know that he’s a second-half player. If he starts the season off slow, don’t worry, he usually turns it up after the All-Star break. Once the weather starts to warm up at Wrigley, he could be a very fun player to watch. The Cubs have no pressure this season, they aren’t expected to be a playoff team. The pressure of the Rays being a contender could have gotten to Pena, so a year on the Cubs could turn back the clock…and let’s hope so

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

White Sox Land Adam Dunn

After many experts predicted that Adam Dunn would pick a National League team, he surprised many and picked the American League’s Chicago White Sox. Dunn has made it clear that he doesn’t want to be used as a designated hitter. The White Sox must have made a promise to the slugger that he will be used at first-base and maybe occasionally in the outfield. How does this impact the rest of the Majors and the team on the Northside?

Dunn and the White Sox have agreed on a 4-year/$56 million dollar deal. Chicago is in need of a designated hitter, even if they promised Dunn that he wouldn’t play there, they could be playing a waiting game. Dunn is 31 years old and scouts have said that he would be best used at DH at this point in his career. Even though his defensive skills have dropped off, his bat has not shown signs of slowing down. He has hit at least 38 home runs the last 8 seasons and is an on-base percentage machine. He may strike out over 170 times a season, but he drives in runs and draws around 100 walks a season. His impact on a team is proven and will make the White Sox a better team. He will protect Carlos Quentin, Alex Rios, and Paul Konerko, if they re-sign him.

The White Sox finished 88-74 last season and the addition of Dunn will add some wins to that total. The Minnesota Twins are the cream of the division and this will close the gap between the teams. The Tigers, Royals, and Indians are all teams in transition and I see the AL Central as a two-team race in 2011.

The initial rumors of teams that Dunn would consider had the Chicago Cubs on top of that list. The amount of the contract may have blow the Cubs out of the water or the years of the deal. The Cubs need to wait a few years for a few bad contracts to come off the books before they add a contract like Dunn signed. They are in the market for a left-handed first baseman with power, Dunn would have fit their need. To make matters worse for the Cubs, Dunn has slaughtered them at Wrigley Field and has done very well there. They will see Dunn a few times over the next years during the cross-town rivalry games.

Dunn will do well at U.S. Cellular Field and will give American League pitchers fits, eventually. He has spent his entire career in the National League. There could be a learning curve for Dunn, since he is strikeout prone, it could take him the first half of the season to learn how to hit certain pitchers. The White Sox made a smart move, GM Kenny Williams has been known to take a gamble, but this is close to a sure thing.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Zambrano To Retire In 2012? C’mon!

Carlos Zambrano, the token hot-head on the Chicago Cubs, came out yesterday and said that he will retire after the 2012 season. He is signed up until then and says that he has missed out on a lot being a Major League baseball player. Really? I’m pretty sure that the $91 million dollar extension can buy back some of that time. Is Zambrano bluffing or is he for real?

Zambrano was expected to anchor the Cubs rotation this season, but somehow ended up falling out of favor with management. He spent a portion of the season coming out of the bullpen, which lead to an “indefinite leave” from the team around the All-Star break after an altercation with Derrek Lee in the dugout. He went through counseling and since returning to the starting rotation, he has registered an ERA below 2.00 and a 6-0 record. He still has a fired up demeanor, but has been able to keep it in check and has been a better teammate.

Is this a pitcher who has came to terms with his problem or a player that is pitching with no pressure? He admitted to a reporter that he no longer wants to play and that’s the reasoning behind his retirement after his contract ends. He has a career record of 114-74 in nine years for the Chicago Cubs. His career started out very rocky by going 5-10 in his first two seasons, but hasn’t had a season that he hasn’t had more wins than losses since. Zambrano’s major fault is that he walks too many batters and his WHIP is always in between 1.30 and 1.50, which is well below average for an MLB pitcher. Statistically, he has had a comparable season in 2010, since his strikeout-to-walk ratio is 2:1, which is his average. He has just been very inconsistent and his numbers would be very bad if not for his recent resurgence.

The Chicago Cubs are looking to rebuild this team with a new manager in 2010. GM Jim Hendry is on the hot seat and will be looking to make moves in the off-season. Zambrano will be his #1 priority to move and his stock is on the rise with his recent play. The Cubs will have to take a discount in their return for the former All-Star, since he is owed $36 million over the final two years of his contract. The most the Cubs could get for him, at this point, would be mid-level prospects. A lot of teams will be scared off of him, since his past anger and hostility could come back. It will be interesting to see what the Cubs can get back in return and how much of his remaining salary they will have to eat.

Do I think Zambrano will retire after the 2012 season at the age of 33? I think he is currently having a hard time professionally and personally and his judgment is a bit skewed. He has never been a free agent and who knows how well he will pitch over the next two seasons. A lot factors in his decision and this isn’t the first time he has mentioned a possible early retirement. If he starts loving the game again, I can see Zambrano signing another contract, but I don’t see him being a Jamie Moyer pitcher and staying in the game near or over the age of 40.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Trading Deadline: Chicago Cubs Trade Bait

The Chicago Cubs appears to be “sellers” at the trading deadline this year. The team seems to be going nowhere with players getting older and wave of youth starting to crack the 40-man roster. The deadline only 72 hours away, so it’s crunch time. Who are the players the Cubs are dangling out there and which Cubbie said that he would not accept a trade to another team? Will the new owner, Ricketts, decide to have a “fire sale” and scrap team for youth?

Ted Lilly – Lilly is the most talked about trade piece the Cubs are currently shopping. He is in the last year of his contract and he’s having a solid season. He has been the most consistent pitcher on the staff since they signed him a few years ago. Chicago has even made it clear that they would eat much of Lilly’s remaining money left on his contract this year to get the best deal. I see him going to the Mets or another fringe contender, possibly the Twins (no rumor of him going to Minnesota is out there, just think that he would be a good fit).

Derrek Lee – He was rumored to be heading out of town since he is also in the last year of his contract. The Los Angeles Angels apparently had a deal in place for him, but he declined it. He wants to play out his contract with Chicago. I’m not sure if he’ll be looking to re-sign with the Cubs this off-season, but he will demand a decent contract.

Carlos Zambrano – The Cubs would LOVE to move Zambrano and his temper out of Chicago. He will be the hardest person on the team to move because of his performance of late and the remaining amout of money that he has left on his contract. The Cubs want to just dump his salary, but they could be left eating much of it, if they want to trade him.

Alfonso Soriano – With the emergence of Tyler Colvin, the Cubs would like to move Soriano and his inflated contract. His contract was backloaded, which means that most of his money will be paid out towards the end of his deal. This will make it nearly impossible for him to be moved. If Soriano was a better fielder, they could easier move him back to 2B, where he played as a member of the Yankees. He has lost a step and his fielding is on par with Manny Ramirez. It would be impossible to trade Soriano right now, but if he starts off hot in 2011, there could be suitors.

Xavier Nady – Early in the season, the rumors started circulating that some teams were looking for a mid-level outfielder with power. Nady was one of the names that was mentioned, but with his recent plummet in his numbers and losing a number of at-bats to Colvin, it doesn’t look like Nady would be someone that a contender would be targeting. Nady needs ample at-bats to be comfortable at the plate, he hasn’t had much success has a pinch-hitter. If the Cubs trade Nady, it would be for a low-level prospect at this point.

Hopefully Chicago can pull off some trades and restock their slim farm system. At the beginning of the year, only Houston had a worse farm system in the NL Central. The Cubs are headed towards rebuilding and let’s hope they get it right this time.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

It’s Official: Dawson Is in Hall Of Fame

The verdict is in and Andre Dawson will be the lone inductee into baseball’s Hall of Fame. It was his 9th year on the ballot and the publicity campaign worked for “The Hawk.” Roberto Alomar and Bert Blyleven were close, but weren’t able to get 75% of the votes to join Dawson.

I have been a huge fan of Andre Dawson since I was about seven years of age. When he appeared on the Cubs, I was unaware where he came from. I was very young and I only kept tabs on the Cubs since I watched them every day on WGN. It wasn’t until later that I found out that he was a star in Montreal for many years. When he arrived in Chicago, he was a home run machine and the clean-up hitter that Chicago needed to finally win a pennant in 1989. He was a nice player to lineup near Ryne Sandberg, but he turned out to be much more for Chicago, since he won the NL MVP in 1987 and lead the league in home runs.

Dawson was clearly a shell of himself later in his career because he played on the very bad turf in Montreal that messed up his knees. He used to have a lot of speed and stole a lot of bases with teammate Tim Raines leading the league many seasons. The Expos were a very fast team, but after playing so many years there, players were plagued with various knee problems. The turf was basically carpet on top of cement.

I will surely be watching the induction of “The Hawk” as I did when Ryne Sandberg was inducted. When you think about the 1987 season for the Cubs, they had Dawson, Sandberg, Rafael Palmeiro, Greg Maddux, Jamie Moyer, and Lee Smith. They had six players that will either be in the Hall of Fame or will be very close. It’s hard to believe that the team finished last place in the NL East that year with a record of 76-85.

It was a shame that Bert Blyleven fell 5 votes of getting into the Hall of Fame. Every pitcher who gets near 300 wins, even if he had nearly as many losses, deserves to get in. He has two more years of eligibility and he should get in next season. Roberto Alomar also fell short in his first year of eligibility. He is another player that should get in and they both faired well in a year with not many stars becoming eligible. Jack Morris also saw an increase in votes, but he still has a long way to go, his name was on about 50% of the ballots.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

Cubs Trade Jake Fox To Oakland

The Cubs received a gift this year, their prospect Jake Fox, a converted catcher, began lighting up the minor leagues. He was hitting the cover off the ball for power and average. A few injuries happened and the Cubs brought him up, but he has no real position on the team since Alfonso Soriano plays in left field. The Cubs had to trade him this off-season, did they get value for Jake Fox?

The deal was that Oakland sent RHP Jeff Gray, minor leaguer OF Matt Spender, and minor leaguer RHP Ronny Morla to the Cubs for Jake Fox, 2B Aaron Miles and cash. If you just look at the trade, this yields nothing instantly for the Cubs. This trade is addition by subtraction. Miles was very bad last year and they can get him off the books, which saves a roster spot and cash for a possible off-season second baseman signing. A lot of people think that they might go after a guy like Orlando Hudson or maybe going after Mark DeRosa again.

Jake Fox fits into what Billy Beane is all about, he’s a guy who will walk and hit for a high average. His ceiling could be Jack Cust with a better average. Jeff Gray is a player that the Cubs will use instantly, he was in 20 games last year for Oakland and had an ERA around 3.50. Morla is a very young prospect that could turn into something in a few seasons and Spencer is a nice prospect that could end up being a nice outfield prospect in a year or so, his highest minor league level is currently AA.

I think this is a nice trade, but not a trade that most Cubs fans would want. They are used to huge splashes in free agency and trades. They hated the Mark DeRosa trade last year, but the Cubs got three very good pitching prospects in the deal and time could favor the Cubs in that trade. Jake Fox was one of the trade pieces that Cubs had in a very small prospect pool. Chicago doesn’t have many prospects to trade, so they are a bad trading partner for most teams. I think the Cubs needed to get rid of Miles and the only way they could was to include Fox in the deal.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

What The Cubs Need To Do This Off-season

Now that the Yankees have won the World Series and the season is officially over, it’s time for Cubs fans to start thinking about what the team needs to do this off-season. Can the Cubs do anything internally to upgrade their bullpen? Can they afford to wait on their high-priced player to contribute or should they deal them to a team for prospects and re-build? We identify some needs, some players that need to go, and some free agents that Tom Ricketts need to sink some money into.

The Cubs have a lot of dead weight on their roster. They have used a lot of money to sign high-priced players that haven’t lived up to their potential. Alsonso Soriano, Milton Bradley, Kosuke Fukudome, and Carlos Zambrano didn’t have great seasons last year and their combined payroll is most than many small market teams. Their pitching staff, especially their closer position, was very rocky and Carlos Marmol completely imploded with a WHIP around 1.50 for most of the year.

Let’s start off with players that are free agents from the Cubs. Kevin Gregg, Reed Johnson, Rich Harden, and John Grabow all are free agents this off-season. First off, let Gregg walk, he wasn’t good on back-to-back days and he played himself out of the closer role. I would also agree with letting Harden leave as well, there are some nice 4th and 5th starters in this free agency pool that could step in and go more than five innings. Harden put extra burden on the bullpen to close games and many of the games Harden would give up a lot of runs the last inning of work. I would say to re-sign Grabow and Johnson to contracts. Grabow is a nice left-hander that could be a possible closer candidate. You would have to give him at least a three-year deal, but I would be okay with that, he showed promise with the Cubs. Reed Johnson would be a nice two-year player as a platoon with Fukudome in center. He is nice off the bench and pinch-hits very well.

Tom Ricketts needs to spend money to make this Cubs roster a contender. You have at least one more year of Pinella as your manager and you need to stack the deck. As a new owner, you will need to make a splash, so your first move should be to sign Mark DeRosa and get him back on the Cubs. The biggest mistake that they made was trading him away. They did get a few nice minor-league pitchers that will probably be on the 40-man roster this next season, but throw the check book at DeRosa. He probably wants at least a three or four year deal, but try and get him for $10 million a year. They shouldn’t care what it costs, it will bring all the Cubs fans together and support Ricketts as the new owner. DeRosa can play nearly every position and if there is an injury, like last year’s injury to Aramis Ramirez, it won’t cost the Cubs games with DeRosa filling in. If you go another season with Aaron Miles and Jeff Baker as your options in case of an injury, you’re going to be hurting.

The other free agents that you need to look at are Bobby Abreu (who they should have signed last year), Chone Figgins, Justin Duchscherer (could be a nice, cheap option as a 4th starter), Randy Wolf, Ben Sheets, and Miguel Tejada (if he would agree to a one-year deal). Abreu will be looking for a huge contract and will probably be out of the Cubs price range. Figgins would also be looking at a huge contract and it would be a multi-year deal, it could be risky, the older he gets, the more his speed could diminish. Justin Duchscherer was out all year recovering from surgery, but his 2008 season was amazing. I know he has injury concerns now, but they could get him at a discount. I would love if they signed him, his upside would be tremendous. Randy Wolf is dependable and you know what you get with him. His upside would be last season when he was coasting through games with an ERA around 3.00. He could have played himself get into nice contract, so the Cubs may have to outbid a few teams if they really want him. I listed Ben Sheets because I think he still has something left in the tank. Who would have thought that Sheets and Jake Peavy would be in baseball no-man’s land, if you add in Brandon Webb, those were the best three pitchers in the league just two seasons ago. You could get Sheets cheap, I would love this signing. Miguel Tejada is the last on my list and rumors have been floating around since he was in Baltimore of a possible deal/signing with the Cubs. If the Cubs were more of a contender, he would sign a one-year deal, but it doesn’t look like they are on the short-list to win the World Series next year, so it would be unlikely.

The Cubs need to do their best to move some player this off-season. Milton Bradley would be the best candidate for this to happen, mostly because of his attitude and the fact that they still owe him more than $20 million over the next two seasons. Some rumors are flying around a trade with the Blue Jays for Vernon Wells, but I don’t see how that makes sense. Wells is a nice player, not great, but he is signed to an ungodly contract. Wells still has five years left and $107 million dollars left on his deal, but the rumor is that the teams would split the contract in half. I still don’t see this happening for the Cubs, since they have received plenty of interest from other teams and the Blue Jays would have to sweeten the deal.

Jake Fox is another player that has to be moved before next season. If the Cubs were in the American League, Fox has the ability to be their franchise designated-hitter for many years, but unfortunately he doesn’t have a position on the Cubs. If they could move him for a nice young starter, it would be in the Cubs best interest to make that deal. The Orioles have a nice stash of young pitchers and we all know how the Cubs love to make trades with the Orioles. I can see this happening, even though I wrote many posts about how the Cubs need to stop trading with bad teams and getting little in return.

Tom Ricketts has a lot to think about this off-season. A lot has been written if the Ricketts family can afford to add to the payroll and it has been a mixed bag of responses. They want to put the profits back into the Cubs and improve the facilities, but before you do that, make one push to get this team to the elite level. They did a great thing by signing Rudy Jaramillo as their hitting coach, he did some great things for the Texas Rangers. These are the things that the new owner needs to do to improve the team. Build the team around fundamentals and get these high-priced players to get back to hitting and pitching and doing everything right. I don’t know what the window of is on this team to be good, but it’s closing. Zambrano could bite the head off of a pitching coach any day, you never know.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

My (Failed) Attempt To Get Bill Simmons To Write For "America’s White Boy"

I read on Deadspin that Bill Simmons would like to start up a website and become the underdog once again. He is currently under contract with ESPN, but this is something that he could possibly do once his contract ends. I am here to offer him a position here at America’s White Boy. Why spend the capital to start a new website when you have a fairly okay one right here. I have to admit, he probably has more perks at ESPN, even if he is rarely in Bristol, CT. Here is my failed attempt at luring Bill Simmons to write for us.

“America’s White Boy” isn’t the biggest sports blog on the internet, it’s only has a page rank of 4 on Google, but hey I won’t censor you. You can talk about basically anything, I’ll allow it. If you want to write a 540,000 word post about how Christina Hendricks’ boobs are better than Salma Hayek’s boobs, go ahead! You could even invite a porn star in your fantasy basketball league, although considering your possible bad blood with your soon-to-be former employer ESPN, you may have to use Yahoo for your league.

You probably won’t be able to land huge interviews for podcasts, I don’t have the bandwith for downloads. Although I will give you creative freedom to do some nice “Top 10” posts, I hear they do well on Digg and Reddit. Think about it…

As far as pay goes, you have enough money, right? “The Book Of Basketball” is going sell a few million copies and I’m sure you’ll end up as an NBA GM at some point. I know the Milwaukee gig didn’t work out, but once the Zombie Sonics GM quits, the job is all yours. Also, please disregard my post on Gunaxin.com about your possible General Manager position with an NBA team. It was meant as tongue-in-cheek, like your constant ribbing of Mike Dunleavy. If you get enough traffic, maybe I can get a pair of Columbus Crew tickets, ’cause I hear that you like soccer.

I have one condition of employment, you would have to move to Columbus, OH. I know, it could be a dealbreaker, but I have to know what my possible employers are doing. I do watch NFL games every weekend, but I doubt my 27-inch Sanyo television compares to Jimmy Kimmel’s set-up, but hey, free Raising Cane’s chicken fingers and White Castle to eat and all the Old Style that you can drink.

In closing, I am the definition of an underdog. I am an accountant during the day and I write for three websites at night. I would write if only one person would read my posts. Sure, I do get some advertising money, but I’ve used it to upgrade my laptop, buy my URL, and be able to attend a blogger conference this weekend. I write to explain my point of view and I hope to make a career out of it at some point. If it’s either here on this site or somewhere else, I love writing. I have been a sports fan since I was a little boy and my fondess memories were watching Chicago Cubs games with my dad. I know athletes aren’t perfect and most are barely role models, but there are times that I forget that and get lost in games that make me feel like a kid again. To modify a quote from “Almost Famous,”What Do I love about sports?….Everything.”

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

If Cubs Trade Bradley, Could Zambrano Go?

Milton Bradley was suspended for the rest of the season by the Chicago Cubs and he still has two years left on his contract and more then $20 million owed to him. It will be hard to get a team to take his contract and/or eat all of that money. Sure, the Cubs could probably trade him, pay most of it, and get little in return, but they need to formulate a plan to get the most in return. How can they do that? Well, Carlos Zambrano could be packaged with him, but would this work?

Carlos Zambrano and Milton Bradley are both vocal and emotional players. Sometimes that emotion can get the best of them, so they are risky players to obtain through a trade. They are both owed a lot of money and signed for multiple years. What teams would be interested in them and who could afford their contracts? Lastly, if a team meets both of those requirements, what players would the Cubs receive?

I scanned through the teams and it seems like the New York Mets would be the best fit. MLBTradeRumors.com offered a scenario earlier this week that maybe an Oliver Perez for Milton Bradley trade could work out for both teams. Perez had a pretty nice 2nd half in 2008, but looked horrible in 2009. The Mets need an outfielder and maybe Perez just needs his mechanics re-worked. I don’t know if a trade like that, even though it would work just in money terms, but if you add Zambrano, maybe the Mets may let go of a player like Jose Reyes or Luis Castillo. Reyes is a great fantasy player, but they were hoping that he would develop into a superstar, which he has not. He has been out nearly 75% of the season this year and his injury affects his speed, his value to the team would drop. Luis Castillo is a nice 2nd baseman, he’s getting a little older and the Mets could be looking to get rid of him. Zambrano would help them secure a top-tier pitcher for their pitcher-friendly new stadium.

With the ownership finally looking like it could be finalized this off-season, the Cubs may try and get some new blood in the organization. It has yet to be seen if Tom Ricketts will be a free-spending owner, since it has been rumored that most of his net-worth is tied up and may not be the “Mark Cuban-esque” owner that most Cubs fans want.

This upcoming season may be the last season for Lou Pinella as the manager of the team and if you eliminate Zambrano and Bradley from the team, it could be a good move. Pinella hasn’t seemed as fired up as he was the first couple years with the team. I don’t know if that is a great thing for the team, but the remarks and comments by Big Z and Bradley has distracted the team and put the spotlight on them in a negative light. If the Cubs can move both players in one move and get 40 cent on the dollar, I would do it. Zambrano is a good pitcher, but he is so inconsistent and emotional that you never know what you’re going to get. For the long-term success of the team, as a Cubs fan, I would support this move.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.

I Give Up: A Manifesto Of A Pissed Off Cubs Fan

This post may be epic and wordy, but I have a lot to get off of my chest. I have stuck by the Cubs through thick and thin, but I am at a point where I may sell my “fanhood” to another team, just like the Cubs have tried to sell the team for the past 24 months. In the following post, I am going to explain why I’m pissed, what the Cubs can do to win me back, why I’m allowed to question my loyalty as a fan, and what the future holds for the Chicago Cubs.

Listen, I am 28 years old, I’ve been through some thin years as a Chicago Cubs fan. I know some people older than me have had even worse experiences than me, but you got to enjoy Jack Brickhouse and Harry Carey longer, so we’re even. The last six years, as a Cubs fan, have been probably some of the best years an Cubs fan could realistically ask for. A few division championships, a few playoff wins, but not one World Series appearance. I know that if a Cubs fan rarely believes that his team has a chance to win the World Series. There is always hope, but you have visions of Steve Garvey, Ivan Rodriguez, and even Augie Ojeda go through your head and grounds your hopes.

This is why I am pissed off. Jim Hendry started off his career as a GM very well. He got pieces that the fans wanted and made everyone excited about the future of the Cubs. We finally had someone that wanted to go out and win right now. That may be the underlying problem with everything that is wrong with the Chicago Cubs. The Cubs haven’t manufactured any great talent out of their farm system in years. Mark Grace was the last great player to come through the farm system. They have lacked the expertise to develop their own players, so they traded their young pieces away for mediocre talent in return. If a team is always in the playoff race, young talent will not have the time to develop at the Major League level. My examples are Rich Hill and Felix Pie, I know neither of them are winning post-season awards right now, but they didn’t have time to develop. Rich Hill bounced around the minors and Chicago the last few seasons. He dominated in the minors and had trouble pitching in Wrigley. Pie also bounced around between Iowa and Chicago and was mostly kept around to make Alfonso Soriano comfortable. They were both traded to the Orioles for scrubs and I hope they flourish in Baltimore.

Which leads me to another reason that I am pissed. Why does Jim Hendry always trade with Andy MacPhail in Baltimore? I know that MacPhail was his boss when he was first with Baltimore, but this personal relationship has severely damaged the Chicago Cubs. If they are such good friends, why was it so difficult to pry Brian Roberts away from him? A rumor floated around for about two seasons that they were in trade talks, but nothing ever happened with that, but somehow we ended up with Ryan Freel and Garrett Olsen? Hendry needs to quit being so chummy with MacPhail and talk with other teams when trying to improve the Chicago Cubs.

Ownership changes have drained this team of any emotion. The players knew that they had to play the entire season with the players already on the team, since they couldn’t add any more payroll because of the sell of the team. Injuries hit the team and Geovany Soto, Derrek Lee, Alfonso Soriano, Aramis Ramirez, and Carlos Zambrano were all missed time at the beginning of the year. The team lacked emotion and even a Lou Pinella rant couldn’t bring them out of their funk. They attempted to get Jake Peavy from the Padres, but couldn’t take on his salary, which lead to the White Sox getting him at a discounted rate near the trade deadline. I’m not saying that Peavy would have won the NL Central for Chicago, but it could have showed the players that management wanted to do everything to win. With no major additions to the team at either trade deadline (I’m sorry John Grabow doesn’t count), the Cubs slipped down the standings as the Cardinals added Mark DeRosa and Matt Holliday. This ownership change happened at the absolute worst time, since this team was a right-fielder and a dominant closer away from at least a Wild-Card spot.

The Cubs have one of the worst farm systems in all of the Major Leagues. They have been signing Type-A and Type-B free-agents the last few seasons and don’t have many blue-chip prospects. Josh Vitters could be their lone future star, but Wellington Castillo and Tyler Colvin both look promising. The problem there is that Vitters plays 3B and Castillo is a catcher, two positions that the Cubs have a small need for. Colvin could turn into a player that they could use, but they are currently tied up in a few bad contracts in the outfield and there isn’t any room for him. John Grabow, Rich Harden, and Kevin Gregg are all Type-A free agents and if they sign with a team, the Cubs could get that team’s first-round draft picks. Jim Hendry was smart in keeping them, even if they have no interest in re-signing the trio. This could help restock the farm system and build this team from the ground up. If only they had the minor league managers and instructors that could develop any of that talent.

I am allowed to question my loyalty to the Chicago Cubs. They are the only team that I have ever rooted for, but they have let me down in a way that I wasn’t ready for. Selling the team at this point, when their team has elite talent, is such a horrible ending to this team’s arc of improvement. I believe that they need to blow up the team. I said it, I didn’t think that I would get to this point, but just ride out the contracts, trade the pieces away that you can get young talent in return, and give me a product on the field that I can feel good about myself while cheering for you. Milton Bradley’s attitude and racially-filled paranoia added with Zambrano’s lack of focus and his inability to sound like he even cares, has made me dislike this team. Give me players like Kerry Wood, who was willing to take a pay-cut to stay with the Cubs out of loyalty. I don’t know if I am at a point where I can see the greed in the players eyes, but there is something that I don’t like about this team.

I’m not asking for a World Series, I’m not asking for an NL Central crown, just give me a team that looks like they are trying and you will have me as a fan of your team for as long as you’ll have me. If any players read this, go out there, run out ground balls, slide hard into double-plays, dive for foul balls, and have fun out there. The season is officially over at the end of the regular season, you’ll have plenty of time to be lazy this off-season.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.