Category Archives: russell martin

America’s White Boy’s 2016 MLB Un-All-Star Team

pablo sandoval boston red sox fat funny america's white boy 2016 MLB Un-All-Star TeamIt has become a yearly tradition that we look at all the former MLB All-Stars that aren’t having very good years.

The season is a little more than half over and it’s not too late for some of these players to bounce back and turn their seasons around. You can look at our Un-All-Star team article last year, many bounced back and finished strong.

Since I’m an active fantasy baseball owner, it didn’t take me long to make this list. A few of these guys were on my teams early this season, but were quickly dropped. I spent most of my time just baffled that some of these guys were actually All-Stars at one point.

The old benchmark for an All-Star was thrown out with the bathwater when Bud Selig decided each team must have at least one representative in the All-Star Game.

Here is America’s White Boy‘s 2016 MLB Un-All-Star team.

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2016 MLB Season Preview: Toronto Blue Jays

Drew Storen toronto blue jays 2016 mlb season preview america's white boyThe Toronto Blue Jays had an impressive season in 2015. They made some of the best trades in baseball and won the AL East.

The Blue Jays arguably have the best offense in baseball. Their lineup is loaded with power hitters who have contended for homer run titles. They also have speed and defense. One underwhelming aspect of their game is pitching. They lost David Price and Mark Buehrle this offseason and replaced them with J.A. Happ and Jesse Chavez. Their rotation needs to step up if they want to repeat as AL East champions.

Can Josh Donaldson win another MVP award?

Here is the 2016 MLB season preview for the Toronto Blue Jays.

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2013 MLB Team Preview: Pittsburgh Pirates


The last time the Pirates ended the season with a record better than .500 was 1992. I included a picture of Russell Crowe wearing a Pirates jacket, because it he’s had a streak of bad movies to rival the Pirates futility.

I picked Pittsburgh to win more than 81 games last season, but they fell just shy of that. They are headed in the right direction, but they are still a few players away from being on the same level as Cincinnati and St. Louis.

Can Andrew McCutchen repeat his MVP-level 2012 season?

Here is the 2013 MLB season preview for the Pittsburgh Pirates. Continue reading

Brad Penny Is The Man, Plus He Hit An Umpire In The Face

I was watching Sportscenter a few days ago and I witnessed something that scared me, but it made me laugh. Brad Penny threw a 96mph fastball and it hit the umpire square in the chin. The upmire, Kerwin Danley, is an old guy and I can only imagine how much that hurt, but the way it happened was such a lazy mess. Russell Martin, the catcher and Whiteboy’s starting catcher on his fantasy team, just threw up his mitt to catch the ball so slow and lazy that he just clearly missed it. Now I’ve seen Penny’s fastball, a couple seasons ago he smoked Ichiro, Jeter, and Big Papi, 1-2-3, in the first inning of an All-Star game with stuff that clocked around 100mph. Luckily the umpire appears to be doing okay, but c’mon Martin, you’re making my fantasy team look bad. Next year I should get a few roto points for knocking an umpire out.If you really want to blame Penny for this, you can’t. The man is dating Eliza Dushku. Really?! Take a look at Penny, he is seriously 50lbs. and a cut-off shirt away from looking like Larry The Cable Guy. I can’t hate the man, I don’t want to take a fastball to the melon.

A Sports & Entertainment blog that focuses on absurdity in sports, snarky banter, updates on Tim Tebow’s virginity, and decent sports gambling advice.